Do you ever look back five years ago and wonder what the hell happened to the awesome, confident, bright and driven girl you were?
I find myself contemplating a lot lately and mainly because I'm failing at life. I can't believe I failed at my back-up universities. I could end up going to some rich ass school, party my education away while simultaneously ensuring both me and my parents become broke. Then marry an ugly rich man. (assuming I somehow miraculously managed to shed the pounds) Thus utilizing his money for my multiple save the animals and children of the world projects.
So much for getting into Harvard. Rory, Elle and the guys from 'Suits', y'all made it seem way to easy.
As it so happens I was texting K and she said something along the lines of "I'm happier trying than I would be if I weren't."
She's absolutely spot-on. I'm happier trying to starve (and occasionally fail) than I would be otherwise. Eating, (or the lack of it) is still a 'comfort thing' My life seems stable, less chaotic when the only thing I have to appease is the weighing scale.
I honestly think I should start editing what I write so my grammar wouldn't be so absolutely horrendous, but all in time my lovelies.
Hugs and Kisses,
Jamie
So much for getting into Harvard. Rory, Elle and the guys from 'Suits', y'all made it seem way to easy.
As it so happens I was texting K and she said something along the lines of "I'm happier trying than I would be if I weren't."
She's absolutely spot-on. I'm happier trying to starve (and occasionally fail) than I would be otherwise. Eating, (or the lack of it) is still a 'comfort thing' My life seems stable, less chaotic when the only thing I have to appease is the weighing scale.
I honestly think I should start editing what I write so my grammar wouldn't be so absolutely horrendous, but all in time my lovelies.
Hugs and Kisses,
Jamie
I can totally relate with this post! I was accepted to multiple colleges, I picked the one that was the cheapest, and thought I was going to have the time of my life. I was going to find my husband, and change the world. Well, neither of those happened; I don't even have a boyfriend lol!
ReplyDeleteHalf of the time I think my life is a sick joke because I thought so many other ideal things would happen and they didn't. That doesn't mean it was all a loss though because I'm in graduate school and trying to enjoy each day regardless of what has or hasn't happened.
Wish you the best!